Friday, December 22, 2006

Festivus! Yes, It's Tomorrow, But...

For the rest of us! Quickie readers know that I'm a big believer/celebrant of Festivus. It falls on Dec. 23 (tomorrow), which unfortunately is a Saturday this year. As most of you won't be logging on tomorrow, it would be an empty holiday without the annual "Airing of Grievances." So use the Comments section to air yours, about anything in sports this year (or, better, right now) that aggrieves you. Now, where's my aluminum pole... -- D.S.

29 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not a grievance, but needs to be called out:

Headline on Sportsline.com:

Pee-Train

Best.Headline.Of.The.Year.

Face of baseball? Try all of sports.

Anonymous said...

Don't forget the Feats of Strength. It's a vastly underrated aspect of Festivus. Happy holidays, Dan.

CMFost said...

I have a grievance with you Dan and you know what it is you have never told us why you left ESPN!!!

RevScottDeMangeMD said...

I've got a problem with the Cincinnati Reds management thinking they are running a retirment home.

I've got a problem with the Bengals offensive line.

I've got a problem with Antonio Pittman and Kirk Barton thinking they are the Eddie George and Orlando Pace.

I've got a problem with Michigan STILL being considered a state despite the fact that the 49 have said they are giving it to Canada and taking Puerto Rico as the 50th.

Sports on the Moon said...

Happy Holidays to all. Now I must go and begin preparing the traditional festivus feast. Then I have a few things to say...

marcomarco said...

I think Grif Jr. has finally earner the monkier Mr. Glass

"he could not say when or how the accident occurred because Griffey did not authorize any more details to be released."

Fumbled 5-knuckle shuffle? Maybe the article will include "Injured Groin"

Ma4tt (the 4 is silent) said...

Grievances? You want grievances!?

I've got a problem with UF fans, Jax bandwagon fans, Favre and Duke bashers, bloggers in general... uh.... haha, just kidding.

Happy holidays, everyone. (Read: MERRY CHRISTMAS)

Sheldiz said...

The guy in front of me at the Ravens game on sunday was holding up a Festivus Maximus sign he had saved from the 2000 super bowl run and added the 2006.

I don't remember how or why that phrase became the catch phrase for the Ravens in the playoffs... but i enjoy it immensely.

Anonymous said...

I've got a problem with:

Peter Angelos

The BCS

The NFL curtailing touchdown celebrations

and too many other things to list...

Sheldiz said...

okay i looked it up.... Billick forbade his team to speak the words "playoff" or "super bowl" so they started calling it festivus.

its like the "drink, drank, drunk" rule in drinking games, when everyone starts saying "consume".
Or is that just at my school?

anyway... mystery solved.

Ben said...

I have a grievance to air with David Stern, but since he's a dictator, he won't listen to my grievance. But he still has to pin me in the feats of strength in order for festivus to be over.

Anonymous said...

Hmm...

Barbaro: I wish he would die.

Brett Favre: You suck, quit.

Media: Too many grievances to count.

Chicks that play video games: They either really suck, or are incredibly annoying.

Dave Littlefield: Quit killing my Pirates.

City of Pittsburgh: So long Penguins, it was nice while it lasted. We'll always have the '91 and '92 Cup years.

Laundry: It never fucking ends!

Santonio Holmes: QUIT FUMBLING!

Merry Christmas (fuck political correctness)

Jo Fer said...

My list of grievances.

Golfers, NASCAR drivers etc. being called "athletes" (I drive to the course to play golf on the weekends. I never real feel like I'm exerting myself in either circumstance)

Bryant Gumbel being allowed to play "sports broadcaster" just because of his media experience. (from his 1st game on thanksgiving. "And the running back runs for about 6 yards on that last play." it was 1 yard)

The lowest two teams in baseball (the last sport without a salary cap) should be relegated for the best two AAA teams. This would force teams like K.C. and Milwaukee to do what it takes to compete, and not just milk their fans for a profit.

Shut down boxing. Put all those resource efforts into the UFC.

Happy Festivus! Remember, no tinsel on the festivus pole....it's distracting.

pedro said...

i have grievance with you too, Dan!

I want that Around the Horn that you were on posted on youtube!!! Quit holding out!!!

Happy holidays everyone

Sheldiz said...

Grievances:

1. TMQ
2. T.O.
3. The 'NFL on Fox' Graphics Department.
4. Anything ending in "Gumbel"
5. Traffic in the Baltimore/Washington Metropolitan Area

Happy Holidays, all.

PS: ma4tt and nyc-steelers -- here's to a great game on Sunday. :)

Dave said...

Hating on the TMQ? Prolly a little too high brow for this crew, huh?

Festivus is not over until you pin your Fawhther!

Big Smitty said...

Tim McCarver
T.O.
Jeremy Jacobs (owner of the Bruins as 98% of peope no longer care about the NHL)
and Seb Pho, JK that was an awesome post, I'm jealous.

jen said...

RevScott~ I'll add Ted Ginn Jr. thinking he's Holmes, Glenn or Boston or Carter or Galloway.... I REALLY think he needs another college year, but- yeah, yeah, yeah, he could get hurt...blah, blah, blah. I still think he needs another year in school.

The freakin' whole Browns' organization. Enough said.

The whole Indians' organization, but especially Lerner...please sell your team to someone who has deep pockets and wants to win

UF, UM, USC fans-stop crying.

Underdogs in the college bowl games that don't even show up, let alone cover

Time Warner Cable

Overpaid professional athletes

"Celebrities" that feel the need to push their religious and political beliefs on us


Geez, thanks for that, Dan! I rarely get up on a soapbox. I'm usually bitching at my husband about stupid stuff

Merry Christmas everyone!

Happy Hanukkah, Kwanza, etc.

jen said...

seb pho- just re-read posts and why does laundry never end!!? UGH. Clothes seem to procreate in the basket! HA

Todd Ching said...

Is there any bigger grievance than the "This is our country" ads?

Also, shame on EA for not making Madden as good as it should.

-Todd (Boston)

amr said...

1. Kevin McHale didn't get AI to Minnesota. He should tender his resignation yesterday.

2. Fransisco Liriano's Tendon doing whatever the hell it did.

3. Damnit, Torii, cut the ball off. Don't try to catch it!

4. Tony Batista and Juan Castro starting for about 90 games combined.

5. Tarvaris Jackson sitting for 13.

Anyone wanna guess where I live?

Charlie (Seattle) said...

I have three grievances.

My GD Raiders. What the hell is their problem? Why are they so terrible? When will Al Davis and Art Shell GO AWAY? How are they going to screw up the draft this coming year?

This site needs to be changed to a more interesting looking format so bad. Whatever happened to the www.danshanoff.com thing?

And...spending Christmas with the girlfriends parents. It's almost like in-laws, but I still have a chance!

Jim said...

Grievance #1: I hate the NHL. I've hated it since I lost my beloved Whalers, but I hate it even more now that the ex-Whalers won the Cup and the Pens (great small market team) are moving. Go to hell, Gary Bettman.

Grievance #2: Will Al Davis hurry up and die?

Grievance #3: I'm still really happy about my alma mater's great football season, but WHY couldn't we have beaten Cincinatti to go to the Orange Bowl?? The Texas Bowl sucks.

Grievance #4: The World Cup was really fun for a couple weeks and the prelim rounds seemed pretty wild, but all those 0-0 ties really sucked the life outta the thing. I love to play soccer in my rec league with our 7-5 or 9-8 etc. scores, but the real thing sucks.

Grievance #5: TMQ does suck, and I'm a former fan who's had comments posted in the article.

Grievance #6: I don't think people should be bashing Simmons for letting his wife write in the articles. She's pretty funny. And I like to imagine what she looks like. She's a runner, I bet she's pretty hot. Or at least used to be before the kid.

Grievance #7: I hate Christmas.

Happy Festivus!

Anonymous said...

I have a grievance...

Matt Millen.

/need I say more?

Twa & Ry Guy said...

Here are my grievances:
1) Michigan football fans and the non-stop whining after they lost to my bucks. Hey guys the field didnt lose it for you among many other excuses

2) Skip Bayless, Dan Shanoff, others in national media wanting lebron to leave cleveland. just bcause the team is playing poorly now does not mean ne is already looking at other teams he will want to play for. I guess i should be worried he will leave, his contract does expire this year..oh wait...

3) the people who work in cell phone kiosks at the mall begging and bothering you to sign up. will you guys pay the $150 or so for me to cancel my current plan? Oh you wont?? then fuck off

thats good for now have a good christmas everyone

Greg said...

I second the grievance with Matt Millen.

The NFL network vs. Comcast (luckily most of the games have sucked).

Playing USC in the Rose Bowl and feeling gipped (gypped?) about it.

Buying presents for relatives you only see once a year.

Happy Festivus!

Tyler said...

my grievances:

* My Redskins winning against the Saints when I had bet against them and when they actually had a shot at a really good draft pick.

* The NBA and college football.

* People saying that the Red Sox are worse than the Yankees.

* ESPN Insider articles.

Christopher G said...

Hey amr, I got a pretty good guess. Add this one to the list:

6. The other M&M boys: Maturi and Mason. Ugh...

At least Monson is gone.

mattie said...

I'm late for this post, but it's still Festivus, and I just saw on Yahoo that Pat Croce has expressed an interest in buying the Knicks. He says Dolan hasn't expressed an interest in selling, but still...


[kramer]IT'S A FESTIVUS MIRACLE![/kramer]