For some reason, I'm feeling "math-ish" this week:
Bengals 28, Steelers 20(Palmer's Vengeance + TJ Housh's return) – (Big Ben sucks + Steelers late turnovers) = Champs are reeling
Broncos 17, Pats 7
(Javon Walker + Pats' energy) - (Brady's career-high 55 passing attempts + Only 1 TD to show for it) = No New England playoffs revenge
Desperation + Keyshawn - Simms injury = 1st Cats W of '06 (and Bucs jockeying for Brady Quinn)
Grossman jinx + Grossman clutch =
Favre's 400th TD + "Fire Marinelli" = GB off schneid
(Peyton's legs + Peyton's arms) X Jags' D = Indy escapes at home
Pennington So-So x No RBs = How is this Jets team 2-1?
Fins' D - Daunte's protection = Time for Titans to start Vince Young
Skins 31, Texans 15
Brunell's accuracy + Portis' comeback = Al Saunders breathes easier
Easy schedule +
Hasselbeck + Manning - Defense = Making the "over" the hard way
McNabb + Westbrook = No choking this time
Kicking + Defense – Cards' O = Grateful Rams fans
Commenters: Add your own "equation!"
-- D.S.
33 comments:
Simms - Spleen = Gradowski. Have y'all seen this? He ruptured his spleen in the 2nd quarter and played most of the rest of the game. Unbelieveable.
He's out at least 6 weeks.
Costas + Comment about K-Rob having a drink to celebrate after Packer's W = apology.
Mike Patterson + 98 yard TD rumble = moving of the San Andreas Fault
Tennesse Titans = Terrible (no adding or subtracting needed)
Giants - 1st half offense = Not making the playoffs
Reggie Bush + Michael Vick x football in New Orleans = Huge ratings for Monday Night football
Tom Brady - Branch - Givens = More misery for New Englanders
Bob Kraft's arrogance = Bad season for the Pats (Tom Brady - Deon Branch - David Givens)
i think eric and jon missed a part of that equation
Bob Krafts Arrogance= Tom Brady+ Bill Bellicheck- Branch -Givens- and the worst offseason loss for them Willie McGinnest
49ers 1-2 + Vernon Davis' broken leg (1st round pick) + poor tackling = Adrian Peterson
you still think Brady Quinn will be a good NFL QB? Might want to get off that bandwagon.
Rudi Johnson + Frank Gore + Tomlinson's bye week = loss for my fantasty team
Simms injury + o line ineptitude + div champ schedule + aarp defense = another wasted first round pick on a o lineman who is worthless.
NOw i feel like a dick for saying simms needed to get hurt. That was gutsy to keep playing with that bad of an injury. Who do you think we will get with our first overall selection. I say trade all their picks for a proven tackle who isnt a revolving door like kenyatta walker.
Short passes + Texans D + Mark Burnell = Consecutive Completions Record
Props to Mark Burnell for that record, but anyone else watching that game think its possibly one of the most meaningless records in the NFL?
Bill's + early lead + early momentum + >300 passing yards + >150 rushing yards = Loss....
Whats worse is:
Bills fan X time = expecting previous equation (excpet for the big offense part)
0-2 record + seemingly easy Titans team - shaky, too close for comfort win = 'Fins fan re-evaluating pre-season expectations
although seeing that the Jets are tied for first and that we started 0-2 and are still just a game back makes me feel slightly better, only slightly
Brady Quinn + NFL = Eli Manning
(terrible first halves)
David Carr- no protection = decent QB
David Carr + protection = top 5 QB
2007 Brady Quinn = 1998 Ryan Leaf
Me + carrying a weapon + DUI + marijuana charge + providing alcohol to minors ='s 5+ years in jail
Chris Henry + carrying a weapon + DUI + marijuana charge + providing alcohol to minors ='s 2 touchdowns and a game ball.
I love sports
Favre - Detroit = The only blemish on an otherwise perfect 7-spot. That fucker.
virgil said...
Kellen Winslow's Mouth + Charlie Frye's Toughness = TBD
while being saddled with the burden of being a lifelong Browns fan, your use of the word "ineptitude" jabs a little at the heart, but as they say "...it is what it is.". That being said does yesterday's game speak more in favor of the Browns even though they suffered the loss, and should the Ravens 3-0 start need to be taken with a grain of salt.
cygnus~ I'm with you...the Browns' played some great football yesterday and shoulda-coulda- woulda won that game. Hey, they scored the first TDs on the Ravens' defense this season. I think "ineptitude" doesn't describe yesterday, that's for sure. With all of the defensive injuries, they sure kicked some butts and showed that the Ravens aren't as fearful as some may think.
Hey, I picked the Ravens in my family pool and lost...only my brother and my husband had faith in the Fudgies. (sorry I always use that name for them...that's what we call them...lovingly, of course!) My brother kept saying that he was going to be a "witness" yesterday (he's a season ticket holder) Well, he witnessed a letdown--again.
Kurt Warner forgetting which team he plays for while throwing an endzone interception to a wide open Ram (one of 3 pics on the day) + Kurt Warner fumbling (8th time this season) to clinch the loss from the hands of victory = Arizona fans counting down the days for Matt Leinart.
Dan Shanoff + Any Bostonian Team Faltering = Blogasm
or, the Wet spot in Dan's shorts
Why don't you give some credit to Denver's unrelenting D? At least the Pats got one TD on em.
Peyton Manning's lack of a soul + advertisers with money = Not a single product left in the American marketplace that Peyton Manning doesn't shill for.
Everytime I see Peyton on a commercial, I think of the old Krusty the Clown generic endorsement slogan: "I heartily endorse this event and/or product!"
Texans + Mario Williams - Reggie Bush = Adrian Peterson
and i bet peterson ends up being a much better fit...
I love the equations!!!
Plaxico on the sideline with his visor on crooked + Shockey's mouth = NY Giants implosion
Come on Dan. Give some love to the Brownies. Everyone expected the Ravens to roll all over them and it came down to a 52 yard FG with 20 seconds left. This was despite not having 4 starters in the 6 starters in the line-up
Alexander+Broken Foot = Madden Curse + Seahawks Collapse
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=2602571
"Everyone expected the Ravens to roll all over them"
Not everyone:
BROWNS (+6.5) over Ravens
Lost in the hullabaloo of the Ravens D: The Ravens' O looks awful. As always.
--Sports Guy
Matt Millen: How many ways can a guy screw things up before management finally gives in and FIRES HIM?!
(see also: Jim Hendry)
How is it no one has mentioned Patrick Chukwurah spewing in slow-mo on Sunday night? Kudos to the TD that ordered that clip replayed during the broadcast!
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